its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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