He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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