Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize