i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
