so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
