also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize
