great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
