I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Randomize