So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
