Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
