They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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