First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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