I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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