OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
