Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
