Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Those nachos came to me in a dream
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
