Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
