She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
well, you know. whores of a feather.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
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