i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize
