the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize