i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
