escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
