I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Randomize
