I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize