you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
how drunk are you?
Several
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
