wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Randomize
