is your mom at the bar?
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
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