I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
