yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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