i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize