yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
