cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Randomize
