It's like God shit irony all over that family
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
