what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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