Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
