the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize