And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
dude. I can hear the air.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize