When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
wow bdsm is so cute
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