i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize