just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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