it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Randomize
