You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize