jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
