And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Randomize
