is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
