help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
