So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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