Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
