The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize