He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
